How Extended Families Can Come Together During the Holiday Season

The holiday season is a time of joy, celebration, and connection. While the festivities often focus on immediate family members, the holidays also present a wonderful opportunity to bring extended families closer together. From grandparents and cousins to aunts and uncles, these gatherings can create lifelong memories and strengthen relationships across generations.

Yet, as rewarding as these moments can be, they also come with challenges. Differences in opinions, expectations, and traditions can sometimes create tension. However, with a bit of planning and thoughtfulness, extended families can use the holiday season to not only celebrate but also forge deeper connections.

Here are some practical and meaningful ways extended families can come together during the holidays, making the season special for everyone involved.

1. Honour Family Traditions While Creating New Ones

Every family has its own traditions, whether it’s a particular dish served at Christmas dinner or a specific way of celebrating New Year's Eve. Sharing these traditions during family gatherings helps younger generations understand their roots and fosters a sense of belonging.

However, the holidays are also a great time to create new traditions that everyone can enjoy together. For instance:

• Host a Family Recipe Swap: Encourage everyone to bring a favourite dish and its recipe. Share stories about how the dish became part of the family’s celebrations.
• Start a Memory Jar: Provide slips of paper for family members to write down favourite memories or what they’re grateful for. Read them together during the celebration.

Many Asian cultures have rich, multi-generational traditions during festive times, such as Lunar New Year or Diwali. Incorporate these into holiday gatherings while blending them with newer practices, such as Secret Santa gift exchanges or potluck-style dinners.

2. Embrace the Power of Storytelling

Storytelling is one of the most powerful ways to bridge generational gaps. Elders can share tales from their youth, family history, or cultural traditions, while younger family members can talk about their experiences and aspirations. These exchanges not only entertain but also preserve family heritage.

Ideas for Storytelling Activities:

• Photo Story Night: Bring out old photo albums and have each family member share the story behind a picture.
• Ancestry Exploration: Use genealogy tools to trace family roots and discuss the findings during the holiday gathering.

Storytelling can include folk tales or personal accounts of migration, cultural resilience, and family achievements, fostering pride and appreciation for shared heritage.

3. Organise Activities for All Age Groups

A holiday gathering should feel inclusive, catering to the needs of all generations. Thoughtful planning ensures that everyone—whether they are toddlers or grandparents—has something to look forward to.

Ideas for Inclusive Activities:

• Craft Stations for Kids: Set up a table with holiday-themed crafts, like making paper lanterns, greeting cards, or ornaments.
• Trivia Games for All: Create a family trivia game with questions about family members, traditions, or general holiday knowledge.
• Outdoor Fun: Plan activities like a scavenger hunt in the park or a light walk to admire festive decorations.

By involving everyone in the planning, you create a sense of excitement and ensure no one feels left out.

4. Incorporate Giving Back as a Family

The holiday season is a time for gratitude and generosity, and involving the entire family in acts of giving can be a deeply rewarding experience.

Ways to Give Back Together:

• Volunteer as a Family: Spend a day helping at a local charity, food bank, or nursing home.
• Donate as a Group: Pool resources to support a meaningful cause. Consider involving children by letting them choose toys or books to donate.
• Create Care Packages: Assemble care packages for underprivileged families or shelters, making it a collaborative effort.

Consider donating to organisations that address local needs, such as educational scholarships or disaster relief funds, reflecting the spirit of community and togetherness.

5. Use Technology to Connect Across Distances

Not all extended family members can make it to holiday gatherings, especially with busy schedules or geographical barriers. Fortunately, technology offers wonderful opportunities to include everyone, no matter where they are.

Ways to Stay Connected Virtually:

• Virtual Celebrations: Host a video call during key moments, like dinner or gift exchanges.
• Family Chat Groups: Use platforms like WhatsApp, WeChat, Telegram, or LINE to share photos, videos, and updates during the celebration.
• Collaborative Digital Projects: Create a shared slideshow, playlist, or digital scrapbook that everyone can contribute to before and during the holidays.

By leveraging technology, families can ensure no one feels left out, even if they’re celebrating from afar.

6. Encourage Healthy Conversations and Conflict Resolution

Holiday gatherings can sometimes bring up unresolved family tensions or disagreements. It’s important to approach such situations with empathy and understanding to keep the celebration harmonious.

Tips for Managing Tensions:

• Set Boundaries: Politely agree to avoid sensitive topics like politics or religion if they’ve caused conflicts in the past.
• Use Active Listening: Make an effort to truly hear and acknowledge each person’s perspective without jumping to conclusions.
• Focus on Shared Goals: Remind everyone that the purpose of the gathering is to celebrate togetherness and create joyful memories.

7. Celebrate Diversity Within the Family

In modern, multicultural families, especially in Asia’s cosmopolitan cities like Singapore, Kuala Lumpur, or Hong Kong, it’s common to have family members from different cultural or religious backgrounds. The holidays are a perfect time to celebrate and learn from this diversity.

Ideas for Embracing Diversity:

• Share Traditions: Invite family members to share their unique cultural practices or holiday customs.
• Explore Fusion Cuisine: Prepare a mix of traditional family dishes and international flavours to reflect the family’s rich cultural tapestry.
• Respect Different Practices: Be mindful of dietary restrictions or religious practices, ensuring everyone feels included and respected.

8. Reflect on Gratitude and Growth

The holidays aren’t just about celebration—they’re also a time to reflect on the year that’s passed and set intentions for the year ahead.

Reflection Activities:

• Gratitude Circle: Go around the table and have each family member share something they’re thankful for.
• Family Vision Board: Collaboratively create a vision board with goals and aspirations for the upcoming year.

This focus on gratitude helps shift the spotlight from material gifts to the emotional connections that truly matter.

Strengthening Family Bonds

The holiday season is a precious time to bring extended families together, creating opportunities to celebrate traditions, make new memories, and strengthen bonds. For parents, these gatherings are also invaluable teachable moments. By modelling values like empathy, collaboration, and respect, you’re shaping the next generation to cherish the importance of family and community.

This holiday season, whether your family is near or far, remember: the most cherished memories aren’t about the gifts or the décor but the moments spent together in love and laughter.

Elizabeth Ann

Community Ambassador; as someone who was raised in a rather privileged family, I hope to address the inequity in educational outcomes based on the circumstance of birth. Bounced around between Australia and Singapore a fair bit.